In the realm in which I am from, glass is a developing discipline. Oh, the rich and powerful do preen themselves in expensive mirrored surfaces, and for a nominal fee you can also summon a dimension shifting mage to open a decent sized portal to the mirror plane, allowing you to gaze upon an exact reflection of oneself with only a 20% chance that it will gain sentience, climb through the portal, try to secretly kill you in your sleep and take over your life with no one the wiser.

And windows? Again, rare. We are mostly a realm of wooden shutters, so the fact that glass replacement companies in Melbourne are so very numerous was a surprise to me at first. I was practicing a sacred, divine, holy and exclusive spell passed down through generations that allows you to punch someone in the face at a distance, but it went awry and I punched straight through my bedroom window. At first I was fearful, thinking that glass was akin to perhaps the enchanted stained glass in the local Sanctified Cathedral. But no, apparently there are just glaziers everywhere, I guess. Glass replacement isn’t exactly what you would call inexpensive, but panes of glass are a common item to be replaced and it is not ‘abnormal’. Especially not with the very normal story I concocted using my knowledge of film and television: I was practicing so that I could one day win a Superbowl, and I accidentally swung my bat in the wrong direction, causing the window to be shattered by the football flying off the tee and hitting the glass.

Yes. Perfect. Glaziers might not be royalty here, but people are generally happy to see them. Maybe I need to get myself into this game. Install some stair balustrades, replace a pane, learn the game…and take it all back to my home realm and make mountains of gold! My banishment is only 400 years, plenty of time to learn glazier skills.