If I had to name my number one fear, it would probably be…werewolves. I know how that sounds but stick with me here. Werewolves are the were-worst. The thing that freaks me out most is that fact that they could be anyone, and you wouldn’t even know. They could be that dark-haired hot guy. Or that other dark-haired hot guy. Or that hot guy with long dark hair! One minute you’ve got a hot guy, and then BAM. Werewolf.
Number two is spiders combined with clowns to create spider-clowns, who can do whatever a spider-clown does. And then…I guess it’d be that recurring dream where I have to give a keynote speech to a group of entomologists on beetle migration cycles, and then I get up there and my hair is a mess, and all the entomologists laugh at me.
There’s a backstory to that one as well! So I sometimes make hair appointments in the Melbourne CBD, even though places tend to be a little bit more pricey right in the city center. Between work and uni, I barely have any time, so this is just how it has to be. Hairdressing on the go! But one time I went to have my hair done and it was a really windy day, so I was all like ‘sure, whatever, I ain’t afraid of no wind’, and I chose a hairstyle with my hair kind of…’up’. Like, not a beehive, but getting there. This was the night of the gala, so I needed to look a bit special. Then I walked out in the wind and BAM. Hair all over the place, scattering to the winds, in tattered pieces just like my life choices. So I had to go to the gala looking like a glam rock star, which wasn’t as good as it sounds.
And so, that’s why all the entomologists are laughing at my terrible hair. Because it happened once in real life. Nowadays when I make a hair salon booking in Melbourne, I check the weather. Then I check for werewolves and spider-clowns, and then nothing to fear.